51978

Joke of the Day

"What car is it best to grow grass on? K-K-K-Kia"

"What's the difference between white time and black time (Warning. Dad joke) The size of their clock."

"My toddler begged to go swimming and then threw a tantrum because she didn't want to get wet in case you were on the fence about having kids"

"That's disgusting! Where did you learn to do that?! Don't wipe boogers on Mommy's pillow! Wipe it on Daddy's"

"[caveman scratches a cave painting of an elephant onto the cave wall] ELEPHANT: delete it"

"Q: How many Pentagon procurement officers does it take to change a lightbulb ? A: Look for only $87 billion we can put up this chain of fluorescent satellites that will illuminate the whole planet."

"How many Sore Losers does it take to change a Lightbulb? Won."

"What did the river say when coal barges stopped?"

"Why do clumsy people get married? They fall in love."

"Knock knock, Who's there? Chuck Norris! Chuck Norris who? ...? Sorry, the joke is over when Chuck Norris gets involved!"