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Joke of the Day
"What do you call a woman with big tits who doesn't make sandwiches? A compromise."
Next Joke
"It's awkward when I have to pull someone aside and point out that my fly is open."
"Michael Phelps will be the flag bearer for the 2016 USA Olympic Team I hope he holds our flag high."
"[NSFW] What's long, cylindrical, hard, full of semen and can make a woman scream? The sock under your bed."
"Sarah Millican just called Stephen Hawking a good sport."
"At the mattress store I set all the sleep numbers to 69, because I'm hilarious and original and sexy."
"I encourage my kids to explore art. I insist they know Picasso's Blue Period had nothing to do with the menstrual cycle of a Smurf."
"Why did the Mexican take his Xanax? For hispanic attacks."
"Dad: ""Hey son, what has four legs and doesn't breathe?"" Son: ""Haha, you can't fool me again Dad! A chair!"" Dad: ""Not this time, son. Our dog died."""
"What does the sign on an out-of-business brothel say? Beat it. We're closed"