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Joke of the Day

"I shot a man in Reno, just to watch him die... then I got Netflix, so now I have better things to watch."

"How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irishman? Zero"

"What do you call two lesbians in a canoe? fur traders"

"3 guys walk into a bar.... and the fourth guy ducks!"

"First day as a drug dealer. Made a ton of sales. Boy are people forgetful, they all left their wallets at home.Gonna be rich tomorrow though"

"Boss: You need supervision. Me: *squints really, really hard*"

"What's the only buttons that work on a redditor's computer? Copy + paste..."

"Obama and Bush walk into a bar... ...Clinton ducked."

"waiter: what would you like to order, sir? me: a naked salad, please. waiter: ... me: you know, no dressing."

"If I was a cannibal I'd only eat women. Because they're seedless."