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Joke of the Day
"What's the only buttons that work on a redditor's computer? Copy + paste..."
Next Joke
"what do you call a dog who sits on a bench and reads his newspaper? a human-dog xDDD"
"Getting married for sex... is like flying on an airplane for food."
"""My advice to you: subtlety."" - The Joker, to Trump"
"What a beautiful day! The sun's shining, the birds are singing, the neighbor's dog is taking a huge crap on my lawn..."
"Donald Trump's campaign is basically that thing where you say the wrong answer in Pictionary then just keep saying it louder and louder"
"Theres no point in tailgating me when I'm going 50 in a 35 zone Also, those red flashing lights on your car look ridiculous"
"i cant feel my face when im with you / please untie me / nose is itchy"
"How many dead hookers does it take to change a lightbulb? Apparently not five, my basement is still dark. (taken from this page: https://www.facebook.com/ImammahdidailyIII?fref=ts)"
"cop joke He got pulled over by a cop. Cop:""I've been waiting all day to catch someone like you."" Boy:""I know sir, I got here as fast as I could."""