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Joke of the Day
"They say you learn alot from your first relationship Ya! That's why i'm not having a second"
Next Joke
"Stephen Hawking calculates the properties of the universe from a wheelchair and I'm googling how to get paid without leaving my house"
"What do you call a cow who argues with her husband? A bullfighter!"
"Maybe if we start the 'Read a Book Challenge' we can raise awareness for stupidity."
"[I open my lunchbox to find flask of whisky] But that means.... [Cut to my 4 y/o opening her lunchbox to find a flask of whisky]"
"Why wasn't Sean Connery standing? He had to shit."
"Two sheep are in a field... One says ""Baaaaaaah"" The other one says, ""Fuck, I was gonna say that!"""
"Why is Donald Trump so intent on building a wall with Mexico? To stop the workers at his construction site from running back!"
"I'm reading a book about anti-gravity It's impossible to put down."
"Rembrandt was unsurpassed in his ability to depict light and shadow in his works, until the camera came out. then he got insanely surpassed"