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Joke of the Day
"Why were the Middle Ages called the Dark Ages? Because there were too many knights."
Next Joke
"Hey smoke detectors, feel free to use that last bit of battery life to continue monitoring fires instead of getting all beepy."
"My phone got married last week. The service was good despite the lousy reception."
"Sorry I can't make it to lunch today. I forgot to shorten ""people"" to ppl in a text this morning and now I'm totally behind schedule."
"What do you call a fat Muslim? Just Mu^~~slim~~"
"It's been three weeks since I put superglue on my friend's pen. But he still can't let it go."
"What type of music do lightning bolts listen to? -Rock and Roll"
"""Charlie, I want a divorce."" [in a black robe sacrificing a chicken on a satanic blood alter] Why?"
"What does Bill Gates call it when someone drops a $20 bill on the ground? Littering."
"My wife and I decided that we don't want to have children anymore. So anybody who wants one can leave us their phone number and address and we will bring one."