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Joke of the Day

"*deliberately drops paper in front of cute girl* Oh my goodness was that my...(sexy voice) political science degree"

"I just had my fence destroyed by a tornado, and I am asking for your help I heard we have a lot of experts in re-posting here."

"It's been a tough year for gluten farmers."

"I am not pro gay. I am not even amateur gay. But, I support their rights."

"Bill Gates is giving 100k to help develop a better & safer condom. I don't care how good it is, im not wearing a condom that says Microsoft."

"How do you know ancient Egyptians loved books so much? Because they built their stuff with reads!"

"After seeing his first ballet at age 6, his parents asked him how he liked it. It was good, but you know all those girls who were on their tippy-toes? Why don't they just get *taller girls?*"

"I work at a women's shoe store Sometimes I tie the laces together... Bitches be trippin'"

"Did you hear about the guy who had to leave his position to become a manager? He was fired up"

"A newbie at work asked me if I knew where the coloured printer was. I said ""It's 2016, Jamal, you can use any printer you want"""