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Joke of the Day

"What is the only type of folder that can make you sick? Salmon Manilla"

"I used to be in a band called The Prevention We hoped people would say we were better than The Cure."

"Doctor: You have two months to live. Patient: But doctor, I won't be able to pay your bill in that time! Doctor: Ok, you have three months to live."

"Way back when, I thought technology would look more like flying cars and less like me yelling ""The laptop's not a touch screen,"" at my kids."

"1000s flocked to NJ to see the Virgin Mary in a tree trunk. But, don't judge them, friends. When was the last time you saw a virgin in NJ?"

"Black people are way more susceptible to diabetes. That's not racist, it's a medical fact. Now if I said ""hide your wallets, there's diabetes patients around here,"" that would be racist."

"A woman is accused of attacking her husband with several of his guitars The Judge asked ""First time offender?"" She replied, ""No, first time a Gibson, then a Fender."""

"People keep telling me to start thinking for myself... I'm not sure what they want me to think about."

"An electrician beat himself with live wires His wife called the police He was charged with battery."

"In LGBTQ acronym, ""Q"" stands for ""queer"" or ""questioning""... It's the ""Don't ask, can't tell"" sexual orientation."