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Joke of the Day

"Only in America: We have a holiday devoted to gratitude & then less than 12 hrs later beat the shit out of each other for a $10 crockpot."

"Graduations are so immature You can hardly get to the end without name calling"

"Where do you hide after killing a black person? behind a badge"

"""The holocaust didn't happen, Buzz Aldrin did 9/11 & I wear my mom's panties."" - guy who doesn't know how to play 2 Truths & a Lie"

"I remember directing a play and I thought I'd spice it up a bit by adding a lesbian shower scene... Some say I'm the fresh and bold thing that theatre needs, others that I ruined the nativity."

"What does Tony Romo and a porn star have in common? They both know how to choke."

"TIL Doctors can screen for STDs by placing a feather along the skin between the penis and the butthole. Doctors don't use this screening method, however, because the test tickles."

"I'm lazy as fuck.. If I ever had to run for my life, I would probably die."

"What did one saggy boob say to the other saggy boob? If we don't get some support, people will think we're nuts!"

"Me: *takes her shirt off & sees a padded bra* whoa Her: I'm so sorry, are you upset? M: *pulls a salami out of my shorts* let's call it even"