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Joke of the Day
"Where do you hide after killing a black person? behind a badge"
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"""You're going to leave me for someone younger,"" my wife explained. ""That's not right,"" I assured her. ""They could be older too."""
"Don't kiss your wife with a runny nose. You might think it's funny, but it's snot."
"It's pronounced like ""jif."" Yeah, well I don't gif a fuck."
"Food is like dark humour Not everyone gets it"
"ME: any advice DAD: its ok to embellish a little [later at job interview] INTERVIEWER: tell me about yourself M: i wrote harry potter"
"What do you call a priest that becomes a lawyer? A father in law."
"What do you call it when a person has a fear of Vietnamese food? They have a Pho-bia!"
"I like my beer, like I like my violence Domestic"
"Guys are always 'just kidding' unless you say yes"