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Joke of the Day

"I told a Catholic girl my penis is named Jesus... ...because it always rises on the third date."

"In Soviet Russia... ...end of joke is when line punches *you*."

"Congratulations to Donald Trump winning the presidency... May his global impact be as tiny as his hands"

"What is the difference between love and lust? Spiiting and swallowing."

"I've got two right here for ya Who are the easiest kids to pick on? Orphans. Who are they going to tell, their parents? Jews should feel lucky. They got their grandparents cremated for free!"

"No thanks, alcohol free mouthwash, my life is depressing enough."

"Back to the Future IV: Marty Mcfly stops being obsessed with his own family and goes back in time to kill Hitler."

"The Lannister family... Is so inbred that they are one step away from being sandwiches."

"Why don't pirates ever stop going to brothels? They can't get enough booty."

"Why do black people only have nightmares? Because we shot the only one who had a dream."