49172
Joke of the Day
"I tried to get an hourglass figure... ...but then I realised it would just be a waist of time."
Next Joke
"Yet another really bad joke A Buddhist goes up to a hot dog stand and says, ""Make me one with everything."""
"Why is divorce so expensive? ... because it's worth it."
"The Grim Reaper walks over to you in his Uggs, taps his Michael Kors watch and says, ""you're literally dead."""
"Does anyone know which homeless shelters provide wifi?"
"Just changed the names of all the girls in my contact list to: ""Jake, from State Farm""."
"I'm optimistic. My life is only half full of shit."
"I just burned 2000 calories. That's the last time I leave brownies in the oven when I take a nap."
"*phone rings* Wife - ""Quick! Pretend I'm not in!"" Me - *puts lipstick on the dog and watches Sleepless in Seattle* Wife - ""...."""""
"I'm really starting to regret dating a dentist... she's always asking me to talk about about my fillings."