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Joke of the Day
"Why don't black people dream? Because the last black person who had a dream got shot."
Next Joke
"How do you say Tony Romo in Spanish?(X-post r/nfl) Mark Sanchez."
"What is the difference between Jared Fogel before prison, and Jared now? Before prison he was paid to eat footlongs."
"I have 10 guns. Obama wants 8 of them. How many guns do I have left? That's right. 10."
"I'm glad that when you shoot, you shoot to kill ... because shooting to merely wound seems kinda mean."
"I'm not scared I'll end up in an asylum after a breakdown. I'm scared someone will record it on their phone and I'll end up on a GIF."
"Internet Explorer is actually my favorite browser.. To download other browsers with Abraham Lincoln, 1863 -Morgan Freeman"
"What do you call a Kardassian on a boat? ...A sea Gul"
"Hello, 911? *twirls phone cord around finger* sooooo how was your day? Did you arrest any bad guys?...No you hang up first! Hello? 911?"
"A little girl says to her Mother: Girl: Mom, I'm Bleeding. Mother: That's OK sweetie. It's just a sign you're becoming a woman. Girl: OK I was just worried about this axe in my shoulder."