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Joke of the Day

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Bashful ! Bashful who ? I can't tell you I'm so embarrassed !"

"My 8yo is watching a video of a guy watching a video of another guy flipping water bottles. Please pray for me during this difficult time."

"Life is like a box of chocolates. It doesn't last long for fat people."

"Whoever named them ""urinal cakes"" has grossly underestimated my love for cake. On a side note, what is the strongest toothpaste available?"

"My girlfriend can manipulate the muscles in her fanny to make a shag feel like a blowjob. Ironically, when she uses the muscles in her mouth, she sounds like a twat."

"The new federal health regulations require every citizen to take a half-hour daily walk. Now at least one part of Obamacare is constitutional."

"How many IT guys does it take to change a light bulb? No IT guys change light bulbs, they just keep flicking the switch on and off again until something happens."

"How much does Jesus love you? Thiiiiiiis much. (Must be said while arms are raised out to side)"

"What do you call an Arnold Palmer with vodka? A John Daly"

"I have an EpiPen... My friend gave it to me as he was dying...It seemed pretty important to him that I have it, I'll cherish it always. edit: grammar"