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Joke of the Day

"How many IT guys does it take to change a light bulb? No IT guys change light bulbs, they just keep flicking the switch on and off again until something happens."

"I think my gran has Alzheimer's. She called me Dave earlier when my name is Carson. Either that or she's thinking of someone else while we're having sex."

"If people could read my mind, I'd get punched in the face a lot."

"Q: Why did the gorilla fall out of the tree ? A: Because it was dead."

"Why couldn't the BMW fit into a narrow parking stall at Target? because it was being driven by a woman"

"How do you win an election? By having people believe that you've won an election."

"What to do with a child soldier lower your aim. someone i met who is in the army told me this is what his sergeant told them, he didnt intend it as a joke."

"What's Malcolm X's favorite Mountain Dew flavour? White-out."

"A woman stands on a boardwalk... She notices a man below looking up her dress. ""You, sir, are no gentleman!"" ""And you, lady, are no blonde!"""

"How do we know that Jesus was made of bread? Because yeasterday he died and tomorrow he will have risen."