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Joke of the Day
"[i sweetly pet a wild baby deer in my lap] aww this is so boring"
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"How do you turn a fox into a cow? Marry her"
"This year's Christmas must-haves? Food, water and shelter! #theclassics"
"A helicopter crashes in a graveyard... the police recovered 300 bodies."
"How does a shepherd integrate black and white flocks? Ewe-substitution"
"911 what is your emergency? Me: ""My 6 year old hasn't stopped talking since he got home"" 911: ""stay calm ma.. Me: MY EARS ARE BLEEDING"
"*Woman throws a drink in my face but I swallow it all perfectly*"
"What country makes the most milk? Nepal"
"I bought some new ""London Bridge Jeans"" They keep falling down."
"What do you call a pair of snakeskin trousers? Serpants."