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Joke of the Day

"*Woman throws a drink in my face but I swallow it all perfectly*"

"I have a Pakistani girl friend. Last night she said that she wanted to blow me. Now I wasn't sure if I should lower my pants or call the cops."

"Age 20: ""You free for lunch?"" ""Yeah, meet you there now."" Age 30: ""You free for lunch?"" ""Yes, let's schedule it in for 3 weeks from now."""

"2 guys walk into a gay bar... and the bartender asks one of them, ""Why the long face?"" The guy answers, ""My eyes are up here."""

"Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because he 8n't afraid to bust out his 9."

"You don't like her? Drink more."

"A girlfriend and boyfriend are talking... The girl says, ""hey John, how do you spell 'pedophilia?'"" He responds, ""gosh honey, why do you need to know? That's an awfully big word for an 8 year old."""

"I felt like making a joke about the stock market but I won't burst your bubble."

"You know what I hate about fashion designers? They are so clothes-minded."

"A summer visitor asked the farmer how long cows should be milked. ""Oh I reckon about the same as short ones!"" the farmer answered."