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Joke of the Day

"Tom Clancy has to pay royalties to Chuck Norris because ""The Sum of All Fears"" is the name of Chuck Norris' autobiography."

"Why did the Polak cross the road? He couldn't get his dick out of the chicken."

"Hispanic magician: ""I will disappear on the count of three. Ready? Uno, dos"" *poof* And just like that he vanished without a tres"

"What do you get when you cross the Italian mafia with the Russian mafia? Thrown in a lake."

"Just realized why my Grandpa called his sideburns thigh ticklers Excuse me guys while I go walk in front of a bus"

"I dream about living in a world where Adobe never asks me to update it."

"Judas: The one I kiss is Jesus Christ. Soldier: You can just point to him. Judas: (putting on lip-balm) I don't tell you how to do your job."

"As it turns out, ""harder"" is a horrible safe word."

"A SHIT JOKE.... Two flies are sitting on a shit. One farted and the other one said ""Do you mind ? I'm eating here....."

"The neck pillow I was using on the Greyhound bus turned out to be an adult diaper somebody left on the seat."