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Joke of the Day

"Rock around the winter clock One, two, three o' clock, two o' clock rock!"

"We're celebrating Thanksgiving the old fashioned way at my place this year By inviting our neighbors over to eat and then killing them and taking their land"

"I pulled my groin the other day.. .. It felt so good, I pulled it one more time."

"My friend told me to stop speaking in numbers... but I didn't 1 2."

"""You've got a friend in me."" - Cannibals, probably"

"Apparently just because your dad had a bunch of DUI's, the cops won't accept ""tradition"" as an excuse as to why you're driving drunk."

"What do sluts shower them selves in? Cum........ I'm sorry a friend told me this and i thought it was so bad i needed to post it."

"They say all of this started because Eve ate an apple. Clearly, the book was altered. Everyone knows it had to be chocolate."

"What is green and smells like pork? Kermits finger..."

"Why did blonde open a fishcan in a shop? Because on top of it was written : Open here."