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Joke of the Day
"If you're happy and you know it, share your meds"
Next Joke
"I got 9 inches last night, 8 inches today and 7 inches coming tonight. Obviously, Winter is happy to see me."
"When my wife does our daughter's hair: ""How about a double French braid swirled into a fancy bun?"" When I do her hair: ""How about a hat?"""
"How do you describe Catwoman in one word? Purrfect"
"Women's Rights... What?. did you expect more?"
"[Pickup Line] Are you a phillips or flathead? OP: Uh, I don't know, why? YOU: I'm just trying to figure out how to screw you."
"My kids are gonna be super disappointed when they find out sweet talk involves no exchange of tangible confectionary goods."
"[Sea fishing] Me: This is fun. [Deep sea fishing] Me: Many men go fishing all their lives without knowing that it's not fish they're after."
"So I'm in the process of house hunting... The deer population has gone out of control in my living room"
"A sandwich walks into a bar and orders a beer. Bartender says, ""Sorry we don't serve food here."""