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Joke of the Day

"Nicknames How do you get bob from ""robert"" ? -no answer How do you get billy from ""william""? -no answer how do you get dick from ""richard""? -ask nicely"

"Why can you only date girls named Ana?... ...because I got a tattoo that says Ana"

"""Girl, if I have to put my love for you in numbers..."" It will be cincuentas."

"human skin boots My friend paid $4,000 for human skin boots and pants. I told him how stupid that was--he could have had the same thing in black for $29."

"I'm an atheist but if lightning struck Trump during his victory speech I'd become a monk."

"At my school, the cafeteria has ""World Cuisine"" day once a week, in which one foreign nation's traditional cuisine is on the menu. Last week, the country was Ethiopia... ...they served us nothing."

"Autocorrect is like being drunk: You only realise what it did after you have left a bad impression."

"What do you get when you put semen in a bat? Abasement."

"what do computers & old testament gods have in common Lots of rules and no mercy"

"Cross a mobster in the streets. Horse's head in the sheets."