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Joke of the Day

"Cross a mobster in the streets. Horse's head in the sheets."

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"Two guys walk into a bar You think the second one would be smart enough to duck"
"What are three signs old age? 1. Becoming forgetful"
"Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because he's homophobic."
"My two year-old has begun shouting ""The end!"" in a sing-song voice when he wants you to stop talking to him. Going to try this myself."
"Why did the cannibal stab the chef with a toothpick? To see if he was done cooking."
"Two drums and a cymbal fall of a cliff... ...ba-dum chhhhhhhhhhh"
"I'm going to run errands, need anything? ""Yes, some new light bulbs"" Why, our current bulbs are too heavy? ""And a good divorce lawyer"""
"James Bond. Great spy? Or guy who gets captured every mission."
"Short story about sharpness. Man 1: What is more sharp Mouth or Anus? Man 2: Mouth. Man 1: Can you cut your shit using your Mouth? Man 2: ..."