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Joke of the Day

"""It's very expensive."" - Chipotle employee ""Look, I got money to spend in here."" - Julia Roberts Pretty Woman 2: Guacamole Costs Extra"

"I told the waitress my coffee tasted like mud... ""It should. It was fresh ground this morning"""

"What's the difference between a meteor and a meteorite? Ite. Sorry, a kid said this in elementary school and it was funny back then :)"

"Your momma's so stupid... ...she asked what army Colonel Sanders was in."

"Forgot to turn on the grill, burgers been on there for half an hour, I know cause the tv show I like's over & nothing's on fire."

"Whats that smell? Auschwitz."

"I had an awkward moment with my english teacher. Apparently pathetic fallacy has nothing to do with erectile dysfunction."

"If you set fire to LMFAO they'll become ROTFLMAO."

"Donald Trump Announces tomorrow his campaign has been the best April Fools Day Joke Ever."

"What do you call a Chinese prostitute? Wun Dum Ho"