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Joke of the Day
"Whats that smell? Auschwitz."
Next Joke
"I said to my wife, 'Hey, I really love these new furry condoms.'' 'Bob, that's a cat.'"
"I was going to buy a greek yogurt today, every little helps. Come on guys, lets pull together."
"I sing like an amputee I can't hold a note, can't carry a tune..."
"[comes out of coma after 12 years] ME: Holy shit I forgot to set my AIM status to 'Away'! DOCTOR: you might want to take a seat"
"Love is that feeling you get when you meet someone that makes you forget about all of your problems cuz they're causing all new problems."
"Ask someone how they're doing & they'll say fine. Share with them a random health issue & wait for the 20 min dissertation on their ailment."
"What is orange and sounds like a parrot ? A carrot"
"""We suspect you may have inability to vocalise emotion disease"" ""I can't say I'm surprised"" *doc strokes beard* ""Hmm yes.Just as we thought"""
"I like to surprise cross-eyed people they never see it coming"