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Joke of the Day
"Donald Trump Announces tomorrow his campaign has been the best April Fools Day Joke Ever."
Next Joke
"Based on the number of nurses on twitter, I now know why I'm bleeding to death in the ER."
"OF COURSE IT'S A GENUINE BEETHOVEN! Look at those brush strokes, the stunning use of colour."
"Nice shoes. Where'd you get them? Him: ... *peeks under bathroom stall* Did you hear me?"
"My Voodoo doll would be a glazed ham wrapped in chicken feathers."
"KID: Why's the sky blue DAD: It's sad MOM: Light refraction DAD: ... MOM: ... DAD: (*mumbling*) light refraction"
"I start every conversation with my employees by saying, ""I shouldn't be telling you this"" just so I know they will listen."
"Have you heard about the Italian chef? He pasta way"
"What's the difference between the armed forces and Comcast? Nobody ever says ""Thank you for your service"" to the latter."
"I saw weird stuff in that place last night. Weird, strange, sick, twisted, gross, godless, evil stuff... and I want it (:"