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Joke of the Day
"You know what is intense? Camping. Is intense."
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"How many programmers does it take to change a lightbulb? None. It's a hardware problem."
"What do you call a lesbian dinosaur A lickalotopuss"
"Gift horse ""My gums are bleeding."" Dentist ""Well this is a professional dilemma..."""
"What do you call it when you grind your teeth because you are bugged you forgot your dental floss? Flossless compression!"
"My ex-wife was deaf. She left me for a deaf friend of hers To be honest, I should have seen the signs."
"Salesman: That suit looks nice. It fits like a bandage. Customer: Thanks. I bought it by accident."
"[1st day at Subway] Boss: u said u'd done this before Me: [painting myself in marinara sauce] I'm really more of an abstract sandwich artist"
"I used to be a sadistic necrophiliac with a penchant for beastiality... Then I realized I was just beating a dead horse."
"What Do you call 20 Millionaires watching the Superbowl? The Dallas Cowboys"