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Joke of the Day

"And the Lord said to John "" Come forth and you shall receive eternal life"" But John came fifth and won a toaster Credits: An ask Reddit post"

"WHY DID THE HIPPOPOTAMUS NEED HIS VENTILIN? BECAUSE HE WAS HIPPOVENTILATING!"

"If you think January has been a big month for marches, you're gonna lose your mind when you hear what the 3rd month of the year is called."

"What do you call a clown and a crook rolling in feces? The US elections."

"Hanging out with fake, toxic people is like running a brothel for diseased cats. I don't do that shit anymore"

"How do mountainers send messages? By ski-mail."

"A Buddhist Monk visits a hot dog stand in New York and says ""make me one with everything""."

"Whats the difference between a good haircut and a bad haircut? About 3 weeks."

"What do you call a bad ass phone that doesn't work? Off the hook. (It's stupid but I did make it up)"

"What's white and troubles at breakfast? Cumshot"