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Joke of the Day

"It was my birthday last week, I got a dehumidifier and a humidifier.... Put them in the same room, let em fight it out. -Steven Wright"

"I asked this girl to talk dirty to me in PM.. Now we are discussing politics and religion."

"when is it okay to punch a midget?(X-post fron r/meanjokes) When he stands next to your girlfriend and says that her hair smells nice."

"How do you get four old ladies to say the F word? Have the fifth one say.... BINGO!"

"Why did the kid steal the fan? He wanted to be cool."

"Have you ever smelled moth balls? Oh, you have? How'd you get between their tiny little legs?"

"Elitist Perfumers no common scents"

"If 40 is the new 20, does that mean 20 is the new 10, and if so, do I need to delete these photos off my phone?"

"I have twin brothers named Juan and Amal. I only carry a picture of one of them because if you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

"Just robbed a bakery I kneaded the dough."