40667

Joke of the Day

"making holy water is easy.... you boil the hell out of it but how to you turn that holy water back into regular tap water? You cook the bejesus out of it. *bejesus may be a local slang but i hope not."

"Is that a gun in your pocket or are you happy to see me? Both! Now get in the fucking van."

"If you blow out the kid's Birthday candles at enough parties, people will just stop inviting you to them."

"What's the difference between Arabs and Americans? American kids come home from boyscouts"

"42 percent of statistics are made up!"

"What can't I find on the internet? My keys"

"Where do bees keep their money? In a honey box."

"Funniest joke ever Your dick is big"

"A women got a wooden breast implant the other day.. This joke would be funny if it had a punchline.. *Wooden tit?*"

"My Grandfather had the heart of a lion and a lifetime ban from the New York City Zoo."