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Joke of the Day

"I passed my hepatitis test with flying colours! I got an A, two B's and a C!"

"I think I may have insomnia But whatever, I won't lose any sleep over it."

"What do you call it when you can't see your skin? Pore resolution"

"One of my favorite high expectation Asian jokes You masturbate? Why you no doctorbate?"

"If cocaine were an old cranky man... He'd say ""blow me""!"

"While walking down the street one day a corrupt Senator... That may be redundant."

"It should be socially acceptable to end any boring conversation by shouting ""UNSUBSCRIBE!"""

"What do you call a quadruple amputee trying to swim? Bob. Same guy laying on the floor? Matt. Same guy hanging on the wall? Art. Same guy in a mailbox? Bill."

"[swipes debit card] *would you like cash back?* yes [gazes at photo in wallet of steve jobs johnny cash & bob hope, whispers] yes i would"

"Yo momma so fat, ...she can't even be emotionally carried away."