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Joke of the Day

"either my xbox is broken, or it wants to get married and start a family... because it's done playing games with me."

"Skin divers How many skin divers does it take to circumcise a blue whale Four"

"me: wanna hang out? southern girl: well, dip me in honey butter, roll me around in mississippi sand and saddle a junebug to savannah me:"

"Did you hear about the Muslim artists who threw paint bombs at a building? They blue it up."

"Q: What does a blonde say when you asked her what the last two words of the national anthem are? A: Play ball."

"My daughter just announced she's SICK of stupid-ass people. I said ""Oh darlin, you're gonna feel ill for a long time.. they're everywhere."""

"How did the dollar bill feel when his change started disappearing? Coincerned"

"I got a new haircut about a week ago. It's starting to grow on me."

"I super glue one jar of pickles shut and leave it out at the barbecue then watch the humiliation unfold."

"Why does Peter Pan Fly? Because he Neverlands."