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Joke of the Day

"How many mystery writers does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two. One to screw it almost all the way in and one to give it a surprising twist at the end."

"Which French novelist looked like a scrotum? Balzac"

"She: Why don't we ever have sex anymore? Me: What's this ""we"" shit? I'm having plenty."

"Why do Mexicans cross the border alone? Because there can only be Juan."

"At a restaurant: ""Would you like a table?"" ""No, not at all. I came here to eat on the floor. Carpet for 5 please."""

"How many psychologists does it take to change a light bulb? Only one, but the light bulb has got to *want* to change."

"What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick"

"How can you tell when an Italian car has a flat tire? Dago wop wop wop"

"What's the difference between cum and Jello? Jello doesn't hit the back of your throat at 120 mph."

"What do you call an angry toilet? Pissed off"