38825

Joke of the Day

"The hot blonde walked up to the bartender and asked for a double entendre... The bartender gave it to her."

"Give a man a fish, and he'll eat for a day Teach a man to fish, and pretty soon the fisheries will be collapsing."

"Why should you always carry toilet paper to the twilight zone? Doodoo doodoo"

"Luke and Obi-Wan walk into a Chinese restaurant. Ten minutes into the meal, Luke's still having trouble with the chopsticks, dropping food everywhere. Obi-Wan finally snaps, ""Use the forks, Luke."""

"What did the IRS agent say to the financially backward store owner? ""Ehh it's easier If I just write it off as tax evasion"""

"People on Tumblr have PTSD Potty Trained and Socially Disordered"

"I love to give homemade gifts. Which one of my kids do you want?"

"My grandfather has the heart of a lion... ...and a lifetime ban from the local zoo."

"What key won't let you through any doors? A turkey."

"good prank: sneak into someone's house every night over a year and replace thier toilet with a slightly larger one until it fills tthe room"