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Joke of the Day

"My girlfriend said she was leaving me because of my obsession with The Monkees. I thought she was joking. Then I saw her face..."

"Did you hear about the monster who had twelve arms and no legs? He was all fingers and thumbs."

"Why did the chicken cross the road? I forget how jokes work :/"

"How did the dictator make it easier for power companies to do business with neighboring countries? He stepped down."

"What did the SJW do for Halloween? Went trigger-treating."

"So engineering school is really hard... I'm not doing so hot in thermodynamics."

"A penny saved is a penny that will sit around in a jar for five years ;)"

"How Do they say ""F**k You"" in Hollywood? ""Trust Me..."""

"[doing crossword] Me: I'm looking for a word that means slight pause Her: Hiatus? Me: *erasing 'our sex life'* thanks"

"I wonder where my brother is, his lunch is getting all cold ... ... ... and eaten.."