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Joke of the Day

"I can't look my former prostitute partner in the face since someone e-mailed me pics of her in the old days. Never look giffed whores in the mouth."

"...I wanted to design defensive structures for the city.... as it turns out, not my Forte."

"How to equally divide a cake among five people with only three cuts Slice three people with your knife and ask the last, ""Do you also want a piece?"""

"Why do girls keep giving me their fax numbers?"

"What is a moo hoo for steak that came late? Filet delay!"

"Define the lecturer Teacher to Student: Can you define the lecturer? Student: A lecturer is person who has bad habit of speaking when someone is sleeping."

"R.I.P. the phrase ""I don't have an opinion on it."" Born 1550 - Died 2014"

"An American soldier talks with a Russian soldier A-We get the equivalent of 3000 calories per day. R-Impossible! No man can eat 60 pounds of potatoes in one day!"

"AOL had the largest growing Stock in 2012 I write jokes and put them on my phone number. 1-855-333-4469. Here's a video that supports the jokes: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_YaFbKvEw9c"

"Cannibal (N.) ~ Someone who is fed up with people."