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Joke of the Day

"An old Chinese saying: If the dog is barking, you didn't cook it enough."

"Condom Warning Condoms no longer guarantee safe sex. A friend of mine was wearing one when he was shot dead by the woman's husband."

"I don't understand why you can lead a horse to water but you can't make a teenager do the dishes."

"chicken. knock knock Why did the chicken cross the road? (To get to the idiots house.) *knock knock* ""Who's there?"" The chicken...."

"If I had more than one kid, I'd call the second kid ... ... etcetera. - Marilyn Manson in his 2013 interview with Larry King."

"If Goku used his kamehameha at Jesus Then Jesus is doomed, because even if he blocks the kamehameha, it would spill through the holes in his hands."

"The women at the club tonight are so unapproachable. Getting discouraged. Good thing mom is here to tell everyone what a super guy I am."

"Is your cat getting enough Chinese food? The answer may surprise you. Mews at 11. NEWS. I said ""news"". Just like a typing human would. What."

"Why did the girl Gorilla engaged to the invisible man call off the wedding? Because in the last analysis she just couldn't see it!"

"first you light 100 candles, then you fall asleep. this 'burn your house down' spell works every time"