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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear the one about the iphone 7 headphone jack? [Removed]"

"Splinters are woods way of sexual assault They can go deep inside you, and the bigger they are, the more it hurts."

"What did Tarzan say when he saw a heard of elephants? Oh look! A heard of elephants."

"My house was haunted, so I got it exorcised by an expert. Unfortunately, I couldn't afford the payment and it got repossessed."

"The Harambe memes need to stop It's very de-meme-ing."

"I'm the kind of friend who will help you hide a dead body, but if you betray me, just remember: I know how to hide a dead body."

"Why couldn't the choir director figure out whether Alison Brie was alto soprano? Everytime he tried, he was told that she was young and that they tried not to sectionalise her."

"Why I Un-Installed League of Legends. To pass my exams, What did you expect?"

"Today seems like the perfect day to make important life altering decisions! - Me, when I've gone two days without sleep"

"""It wasn't always easy growing up. Sometimes we had to wait .04 seconds for 9 million Google results to load."" - 2044 Presidential candidate"