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Joke of the Day
"In my day a hand on my crotch was third base... now even a hand job is a foul ball!"
Next Joke
"Rumours of a food shortage..... Rumours of a food shortage at this year's Spoonerism Awards turned out to be a complete lack of pies."
"I'll do a lot of things for money, but I draw the line at working..."
"This morning i used redbull instead of water to make my coffee. After 15 minutes of driving on the highway, i realized i left my car at home!!!"
"Octopus have 3 hearts, what has 13 hearts and no organs? A deck of playing cards."
"Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton run for president. Who loses? America."
"What type of gun do time travelers use? A Clock-18"
"What do fat people do in the summer? Stink"
"forrest gump (1994): this film gave me very unrealistic expectations of what my life would be like as a huge idiot. 2/10"
"I told her she has a nice ass. As a lady, she looked at me like my mom didn't raise me right. But we all know she'll smile about it in the ladies room."