35532

Joke of the Day

"Did you hear oxygen and magnesium started dating? I know, right! Like, OMg!"

"Facebook should add a hug and kiss button that way people can have a little foreplay before getting poked."

"Poor Sally (2 parter) Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms... **quickly followed by** Knock Knock *Who's there?* Not Sally."

"I hate it when I mean to buy seedless grapes but instead I accidentally get...well you know... Oreos."

"Did you hear about the avon lady ? Max Factor"

"Teach a man to fish and feed him for a day. Shoot him in the face and never have to deal with that whiny douchebag again."

"How does a sloth hang itself? By trying to jump rope."

"Socialist jokes are not funny Unless everyone gets them."

"What's common between a good boyfriend and a lion? They're both ready to eat you"

"How could batman possibly defeat superman? Put him on a horse I'm now going to hell with the rest of you..."