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Joke of the Day
"What's long, hard, black, wet, and full of seamen? A submarine, you dirty fuck."
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"Never drink and derive You'll integrate something you don't need."
"Pinterest is a great place to organize ideas you'll never follow through on."
"What's a pirates favorite thing to knit? Scaaaaaarrves"
"How do you say constipated in German? Fahfrompoopin"
"Can't help but think if I hadn't eaten that baby corn in 2001 it would now be teenage corn."
"Where did the kid with adhd go? Aushwitz"
"How do you get to Auschwitz from Berlin? You have to take the Third Reich."
"I think Jerry Springer should moderate the next debate."
"If my name was Dave I'd text my friends today saying ""IT'S FRIDAVE! LET'S PARTY!"". They'd be sick of me by Tuesdave."