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Joke of the Day

"23. RT @Highlights: Parents, at what age do you think it's okay for a child to get his or her own cell phone?"

"Why did the ghosts haunt the bar? For the boos."

"[dude is just absolutely drowning in the ocean, lifeguard sits back and smiles] i love no save november"

"Joke Police arrested a drunkard & askd: Where r u going.. Man: I-m going 2 listen lecture on ill effects of drinking. Cop: Who-ll lecture at midnight .. Man: My wife.."

"Packing for a trip, Husband says I don't need to overpack. It is so cute how he thinks I'm coming back."

"Finally finished reading the iTunes license agreement. There's a killer recipe for duck a l'orange on page 6,374."

"Did you hear about the guy who lost his left leg and arm in a car crash? He's all right now."

"A Freudian slip is when you say one thing but you mean your mother."

"Men think of arguments as single isolated events. Women, in my experience, think of them as installments in some sort of perpetual continuum"

"I just won the Polish Lottery..... $1.00 a year for a million years."