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Joke of the Day
"Why are the Dutch such great bakers? They know their way around an oven..."
Next Joke
"What did the snot say to the nose? I gotta run."
"ME: *brings my mom to a knife fight* MOM: *shouting* use your words! MOM: *chasing knife fighters away with a broom* I know your mothers!"
"A movie theater near me closed down they didn't meet projections"
"Why did my girlfriend cross the road? To get back to the first shop we went to 4 fucking hours ago!"
"Babies are the most helpless & vulnerable of humans, it's fked up that they're the only humans you're allowed to just throw into the air."
"How do you stop water from running? Don't pay the water bill."
"Why did the lizard go on a diet ? It weighed too much for its scales !"
"I like my coffee like I like my women.. Thrown into a burlap sack and transported across the border."
"Monica Lewinsky says she WILL endorse Hillary for president... ..says Hillary Clinton ""doesn't suck."""