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Joke of the Day
"Which dance will a chicken not do ? The foxtrot !"
Next Joke
"*speed dating* I'm a competitive eater! Date: Are you any good? [grabbing my suitcase, dumping 45 hotdogs on table] funny you should ask"
"What did the thirsty weatherman say to his intern? I need my thermos, stat!"
"What do you call a fish with two knees? A two-knee fish! (works better when you're drunk)"
"Just like Jesus I can walk on water, if it's cold enough."
"Why don't feminists carry handguns? Because of the triggers. I'm sorry"
"LPT: If you couldn't fit all of the planets in the planetary alignment in one shot Try backing up a bit"
"yo mama's teeth so yellow that when she smiles everyone sings ""i got sunshine on a cloudy day""....."
"Sometimes I go on WebMD to see what I'm currently dying of."
"I have the body of a God... ...unfortunately it's Buddha."