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Joke of the Day
"If you are what you eat Then that explains why I'm such an asshole"
Next Joke
"What do you call immigrants in Sweden? Swede-ish"
"Why its called 'having your period' and not 'rolling out the red carpet ' I'll never know."
"When hoes say, new year new me... they really mean new guys, new dick."
"The national bird of Syria is.. ..a drone."
"I'd kill for Opie's pizza. Unfortunately, they never deliver. :("
"What is the scariest part of a cavity search? When they put both their hands on your shoulders but keep searching"
"To all the ""I'm moving to Canada"" people out there, you're being ridiculous. You won't be far enough to escape the nuclear fallout. Shoot for New Zealand or Australia."
"I have no idea who is gonna die first in this movie, because everyone is white."
"Somebody once told me in the middle of a huge machine gun battle that I always emphasize the boring parts of anecdotes, which made me sad."