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Joke of the Day
"I've just bought you all a deck of cards. Deal with it."
Next Joke
"Well I finally solved my drinking problem, I joined Alcoholics Anonymous Yeah I still drink, I just use a different name, that's all (Courtesy of Rodney Dangerfield on The Johnny Carson Show)"
"Why did the T-rex cross the road? Chickens didn't exist yet."
"Why do we call lady parts beavers? Because they devour wood."
"What do you call an onion with no shoes?"
"Native Americans had a word for ""Bad Hunter"" Vegetarian."
"I never really got the concept of exact change... It just never made cents."
"What do you call an amorous vampire? A neck-romancer"
"[creates anti aging pill] Reporter: wow imagine all the human applications this can have *I scribble out 'give to puppies'* Yeah absolutely"
"I have $5,000,000 in one pocket and $2,000,000 in the other. What do I have? Someone else's pants."