324

Joke of the Day

"What did the Marine Biologist say when he saw two eels making love? ""It's a Moray."""

"I couldn't afford a vanity license plate, so I named my dog 956 XDM."

"Did you hear about the identical twins who robbed a bank? After they were caught, they finished each other's sentences."

"Why wasn't the son of God worried when Microsoft Word crashed while he was writing his term paper? Because Jesus saves."

"Ronda Rousey and I have something in common We both finish in 34 seconds."

"I've just started my own company called Flying Fuck Airlines. Judging from what I've seen here, it's going to be an outstanding success."

"I'm going to take a shower and wash my hair, only to have it washed later at the salon. Because, I'm a woman and that makes sense."

"Lance Armstrong I hear Lance Armstrong was doping to win the Tour de France again this year."

"The key to being smart is not talking about shit you don't know about. You should try it. Like immediately."

"I recently bought a teddy bear named Muhammad... for $10. And a week later, sold it for $20. The question is, did I make a Prophet?"