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Joke of the Day

"As he inserted the rectal thermometer, I got a painfully hard and obvious erection... ""Maybe you should wait outside whilst I examine your dog,"" said the vet."

"Think about a future where humanity has no choice but to leave earth. It's unsettling"

"Jared from Subway got raided for child porn. That gives a whole new meaning to ""Eat Fresh"""

"In a Catholic boarding school, how do you know when to go to bed? The big hand touches the little hand."

"Karma takes too long, I'd rather beat the shit out of you just now."

"tower shaped appetisers are a bit of a mouthful. Talk about tall hors d'oeuvre"

"You never really forget how to misquote sayings. It's like buying a bicycle"

"Nudist's have the right idea.. Screw laundry!"

"I can't turn my head very far in either direction It's a pain in the neck! My mom made that up."

"Every day is a holiday if you love yelling."