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Joke of the Day

"Getting a red heart instead of a yellow star makes me feel like things are moving a little too fast between us."

"Some people might find a grown man talking to himself strange, & it's probably the couple sitting next to me."

"I like my coffee like I like my slaves #2 Fuck her right in the pussy."

"Why did the chicken go around the world? Because his name was Marco Pollo.."

"Light a man a fire... Light a man a fire and he'll be warm for the night. Light a man afire and he'll be warm the rest of his life. (I know it's a repost, but I've never seen the play on words, shame)"

"What's the difference between a prostitute with diarrhea and an epileptic corn-husker? One of them has the fits while shucking."

"Statistics say there's a gay guy in every group of friends. I think it's Tim.. he's got a great ass."

"A baby frog just purposely threw himself in front of my lawn mower..... I guess he wanted to Kermit suicide."

"Difference between Port Authority and a lobster with breast implants? One's a crusty bus station... The other's a busty crustacean!"

"What happens when a soviet and a german have a child? I don't know but he can conquer poland really fast."