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Joke of the Day

"Statistics say there's a gay guy in every group of friends. I think it's Tim.. he's got a great ass."

"Joke about a psychic and water Something something clairboyant Can't be bothered to actually write a joke but the essence is here."

"I'm pretty sober. But I'm prettier drunk."

"I got fired today from my summer job as a massage therapist My boss said I rubbed people the wrong way"

"I got a notice we are taking company pictures today. *walks in dressed as Super Girl."

"My wifes hair is so sexy, Its 50 shades of grey."

"I came here to tell a gay joke... Butt fuck it."

"I'm writing a ""Choose Your Own Adventure"" book about being in a Chinese family. No matter what page you turn to, you're never good enough"

"When's the best time of day to start a diet? 4:00 For:Klock"

"My girlfriend's a crappy computer ... she always shuts down when I need her but never shuts up when I don't."