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Joke of the Day
"How did the pharmacist know his drink was spiked? He fainted after the punch line."
Next Joke
"To best understand men, you need to grasp the following: 1. They think with their pen!s 2. They wanna fix everything 3. They wanna fix everything with their pen!s"
"If I was hanging off a cliff for my life and you told me to take your hand I would stop screaming to tell you I'm afraid of intimacy"
"I have a great 90's joke! Not!!"
"TIME TRAVELER: I'm here from the future ME: Really? Who wins the election? TT: Omg it's such a disgrace ME: You need to be more specific"
"What is orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot!"
"My neighbor's burglar alarm goes off so often that people just ignore it. On the upside, their new plasma TV looks great in my living room."
"What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash with a baseball bat and the other is just.... Well... A watermelon."
"I don't mean to brag, but I'm in my 30's and my bank account makes me look 21."
"So the other day in calculus we were talking about concavity I asked if that's why prisoners brush their teeth"